WritingSkills.my.id - There are many factors to be considered in choosing certain language style in writing business letters. Those factors are tone, outlook, "you approach", and organization. The correct use of style in sending the message by means of writing creates very positive effect to the readers. The same result happens when other factors are applied correctly.
By using "You Approach" style, business
letters will sound polite and thoughtful to the readers. In other
words, a business letter should be reader-oriented.
It is as if the writer of
the letter shares his/her mind with the reader. For example, "Please accept
our apologies for the delay" is a polite and perfect sentence. However, this
sentence, "We hope you have not been seriously inconvenienced by the delay" is
not only a polite and perfect sentence, but also shows that the writer has
his/her attention to the reader.
The use of pronoun such as I,
we, you, your, my, and our in certain
situation will make a business letter show closeness and personal approach
from the writer to the reader. The business letter will sound like a direct
talk (face-to-face talk).
The use of pronoun will ease the arrangement of active sentences, not passive
sentences, and thus the letter style will be direct and clear. Instead of
using passive sentences, try to make the sentences active. See some examples
below:
- Our address records have been amended ...
+ We've changed your address in our records ...
- The company policy is ...
+ Our policy is ...
However, it must be noted, when it is necessary to use pronoun, we must follow
the following consideration:
-
Use "I" when it refers to self (the writer who will sign the
letter).
-
Use "we" when it refers to the company which is represented in the
letter.
-
Avoid using the name of your company or the phrase "our company"
because the two expressions will make the letter sound ungainly. It is like
mentioning your name instead of using pronoun "I" or "me".
The following are two examples of business letter with different use of
sentences regarding "You Approach" and not "You Approach". As you read them,
you will find out that the second letter sounds more "you-oriented" than the
first letter.
The First Letter
|
Dear Ms. Ermawati:
Having conducted our standard credit investigation, we have concluded that it would be unwise for us to grant you credit at this time.
We believe that the extent of your current obligations makes you a bad credit risk. As you can understand, it is in our best interest to grant charge account only to those customers with proven ability to pay.
Please accept our sincere regrets and feel free to continue to shop at Ibis' on a cash-basis.
Sincerely yours,
Ibis HP |
The Second Letter
|
Dear Ms. Ermawati:
I am sorry to inform you that your application for an Ibis' charge account has been turned down.
Our credit department believes that, because of your current obligations, additional credit might be difficult for you to handle at this time. Your credit reputation is too valuable to be placed in jeopardy. We will be delighted, of course, to reconsider your application in the future should your financial responsibilities reduced. Until then, we hope you will continue to shop at Ibis' where EVERY customer is our prime concern.
Sincerely yours,
Ibis HP |
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